By Fawzya Khosti, C.HT., M.A.Ed./C.I., Ed.D. (abd)

What is self-esteem? Do you know how to evaluate yours? Do you have a positive or negative opinion of yourself? Before you make a decision, let’s start with a simple and clear definition of self-esteem. When I work with my clients, I refer to self-esteem as how someone feels about who they are. Your self-esteem includes your self-worth, and your ability to respect yourself. Now take a moment and evaluate how you feel about who you are. Do you have a healthy self-esteem or does yours need some work? Clearly, there are many factors that contribute to creating and maintaining a healthy self-esteem. Below are a few tips that can help you on your journey to creating and maintain a healthy self-esteem.


When working on creating or maintaining a healthy self-esteem focus on the positive feelings about who you are. When you find yourself thinking negative thoughts (as many people do) change your focus and replace the negative thought with a positive thought. This practice may take some time but saying positive things about yourself to yourself and to others will change your mindset and the way you see yourself as well as how others see you.

Focus on developing healthy relationships. When possible, stay away from relationships that are negative and do not make you feel good about who you are. And when you cannot part ways with negative people, remember that nobody is perfect and that everyone is working on something so try not to take it personally when they are negative with you.


When you say yes to everything you can become overwhelmed easily, therefore the quality of your work may go down. This can be damaging to your self-esteem if others become unhappy with your work. To remedy this situation, make sure you are selective and only agree to do things that you know you can do in the time frame that has been given. The work you do should make you feel good about who you are. Just because someone asks you to do something does not mean you have to say yes.

If you do get in over your head, make sure you ask for help. Knowing you have someone to go to for help will help to reduce your stress.


Take good care of your mind, your body and your soul. Staying positive is essential to a healthy self-esteem. It is impossible to have a healthy self-esteem if you do not take care of yourself. Exercise daily, even if it is just a walk around the block. Feed your soul, meditate, go to church or Synagogue. Spend time with friends and family. Do at least one thing that makes you feel good about who you are every day. It can be as simple as saying, “good morning” to your neighbor or being patient with someone who is having a rough day. Be the best version of who you are and you will feel good about who you are.


Fawzya KhostiC.HT., M.A.Ed./CI, Ed.D. (abd), Executive Function Coach and Certified Hypnotherapist

Fawzya is an educator and certified hypnotherapist. She has helped students with a variety of challenges, including AD/HD, dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyscalculia, high functioning autism, and anxiety improve their executive function skills and become more successful. Fawzya also consults with homeschooling families and has experience homeschooling children for other families. She loves watching others reach their highest potential.